My Oct 30th post was on 'The Indian Youth and PDA'. Of course the observation lens was that of a 30+ guy! After the post, I had asked a teen friend of mine to pen her thoughts on the subject( hey crowdcasting in action:-) which she did beautifully. So sharing her note with the blogizens with her permission of course!
Here we go!
Love and affection are, according to me, the most private of emotions, a moment between two individuals that means more than the world to them, not exactly the kind of stuff you flaunt to the world. It's not supposed to be a fashion statement, it's not supposed to be "cool", there aren't supposed to be any ulterior motives here, but I guess that's what it's come to now.
I know there are those moments when ur wid that special someone and you can't help but give them a hug or a brief kiss but don't turn it into a full-on A rated flick. Believe me, your audience will NOT appreciate it(even if they ARE your best pals).
P.D.A. is rampant in the younger sect, I mean real young. Think teeny boppers, high school and junior college kids, I guess puberty hits hard. I'll admit my friends and I weren't exactly discrete(some of us still aren't), but we've pretty much grown up now.
Then again there's the thrill factor. I know of a chick who likes getting it on in public just to see the heads turn. Not quite my idea of fun, but to each his own I guess. It's fun to let go sometimes but choose your spectators carefully, you don't want to end up grounded or, even worse, in the slammer.
P.D.A. can also be perceived as territorial and people may see it as a silent warning saying,"Back off, or else!" You would might as well make like a dog and bare your teeth and growl. Another perception of the overt affection you're showering is that of a facade to hide your insecurities regarding your significant other.
And when it comes to being intimate with friends, I've noticed women usually share a closer bond, but now in the age of the "metrosexual man", guys are getting increasingly comfortable with the idea of gettin mushy with their pals. But you don't just go and force a bear hug on someone you barely(pun not intended) know. it depends on how comfortable you are with the person and the kind of equation you share with them.
But yes, the youth is definitely more physical in expressing their affection for friends. Come to think of it if kids of the previous generation were ever sighted hugging their peers, it would be majorly speculated and probably turn into a bit of juicy gossip. But even this evolution, I think, is limited to a minority of the urbane stratum.
So, although i agree that P.D.A. should not be banned(I believe in Freedom of Expression- Article 19), I think using P.D.A. as a tool to get attention or to make a statement is just wrong. You're ruining the sanctity of the relationship. And on a cheekier note, a piece of advice to all the ladies out their, lavishing their love on their worse halves in the eye of the public, "Don't fake it too often girl, he just might catch on!"(pun definitely intended).
In the last few months while interacting with younger minds, I have realised that their language, their canvas and their voice is so refreshingly different that often research done on youth by older guys loses the flavour as well as insights!
Someday when any of you drops in at David, I will take you through a teen girl research which two of my trainees had done this summer. A hand-crafted piece of 'Research as Art' not a power-pointed document. It reverberates with 'teen spirit'! I think it's the best research done on the young teen girl that I have seen in India!
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